Archive for February, 2011

Sneak Peak Sundays

Every Sunday I will attempt to share an excerpt from my work in progress…”You Can Hope”.

What else do you do on your 25th birthday except for run away from pain. Escape the world. That’s all I could do  was run. Run as fast as I could. Shocker of all shockers,  I ran right to the gravesite. Ran to the gravesite and cried. Cried every tear that hadn’t been shed in the past 5 days. Every statement that hadn’t been said. Every curse word that hadn’t been cursed.  It all came out at the gravesite that morning. Me. My dads dead body. Jesus. And some random small town lady who saw this crazy girl screaming and pacing around a pile of dirt. Thank God this good Samaritan came over to the crazy girl. Of course I didn’t notice her til she was right behind me, tapping my shoulder. ‘ Honey, what do you need’. Clearly we know she’s a griever- she knows she can’t make things better, she can’t ask whats wrong, she sees the pile of dirt. She knows the pain. Her next question seals the deal, ‘do you want me to sit with you’. Grievers don’t need solutions. They don’t need their pain taken away. They need people to just sit. Sit at the pile of dirt with them. I looked her right in the eyes and said yes. We sat at my pile of dirt and cried. I don’t know if she was crying over her loss or for mine. But we sat. I’m not sure who that woman was, but in my head she’s an angel.


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mmm pie

It’s not a secret. I love pie. I think it is one of the best inventions on this earth. Living in the great city of Chicago, in one of the best neighborhoods in Chicago, I spend my fair share of time at the Green City Market during the summer. Pretty much think of a farmers market on Ritalin and that is Green City Market. All of the healthiest foods in Chicago brought to my backyard, excluding one non healthy item that frequents Green City quite often….Hoosier Mama Pies. Another word for these pies would be gold in food form. Incredible and hands down the best ‘sweet’ food I’ve ever tried. My favorite, who I only cheat on if it’s not available, is the sugar cream pie. Essentially eating this pie makes you think there are no problems in this world that pie can’t fix. It is so good.

The other day I came home for lunch and turned on the TV for background noise and the fav food critic Rachel Ray was bouncing around Chicago. She made her way over to Hoosier Mama Pies(http://www.hoosiermamapie.com/) and loved them almost as much as I do. I cannot tell you the joy I felt after Rachel Ray validated my favorite dessert ever. I felt finally heard! She was encouraging all listeners of Rachel Ray to get over to Chicago as fast as possible to try out these insane pies.

And then I had the strangest thought ever…get used to it the things I say and the thoughts I have…so wierd!

We are celebrity endorsed the same way Rachel Ray(and myself) endorse Sugar Cream Pies. God likes us and talks about us, the same way I talk about these pies. I know, it’s a little out there, but go with me for a minute.

God could have created anything to represent his identity. Yet he was quite pleased with his creation, satisfied with our existence. We are what he wanted. And then he said it was good. We have God’s full approval. We are ‘celebrity’ endorsed.

How often do we fall into this thought they we are anything other than the perfection God created. How often do we live as how we are not intended to be. How often do we live not ‘endorsed’.

Its time to delight our maker. To live fully endorsed as his creation.

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My little sick friend

I said the oddest thing to my friend the other day. We had big plans to go to Moth Story Night;  http://www.themoth.org/. I’ve never been but it looks incredible and I’m so curious to see what a storytelling night would look like. I’m pretty sure I’m about to become a big fan. But climax of this story…tickets were sold out once we got there. Sad.

Plan b. Head to my house and watch glee. I had to give her the warning I’ve been throwing around a lot this week, “yes, come over but FYI my roommate is sick”. Poor little Ashley has been coughing like a 90-year-old all week. No good. Many close people in my life have been quite sick this past month, maybe blame it on Midwest weather changes. So as I was telling her about the inevitable cess pool of germs in my condo we were about to walk into, I said “I really love seeing how people act when they are sick.” Such a weird thing to say, I know.

But I really do find it interesting and relevant to relationships while watching how someone looks to be loved when they are sick. Sickness can be such a helpless experience. You’re in this raw state that is craving a certain way to be taken care of. I think its become a fairly big part of our culture that we don’t want to admit we need to be taken care of. This drive of independence I know runs through my family, and many of my close friends. So when your forced into it, you learn a lot about that person.  My mom on one hand, needs to heard. She needs to describe to you what is going on and talk through worries or concerns to feel better about them or make a plan of how to fix them. Ashley, needs to be around people. I need words from others to build me up. Now, here’s my hypothesis, these are always the ways that person wants to be loved and helps them feel better, yet that true raw form comes out more when they are sick.

So, now  my challenge is, look at the people close to you in your life, how do they need to be loved when they are sick? How can you love them better by providing that for them when sick or not…

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Every time I’m stuck in my car for a long period of time and start getting bored I pull out the indie playlists on my ipod and begin daydreaming of what my life would be like if I would have pursued one of the many instruments that I tried my hand at when I was young. Little Michaja attempted almost all instruments you could think of from recorder….to saxophone. Unfortunately, none of them really stuck.

Even though lady gaga has my heart, I really think if I would have pursued one of my musical dreams I would have a voice like sara bareilles and rock the keys like Jamie Cullum…Can you picture it now! I think I missed my calling…

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Movie Club!

My friend & neighbor Jen W. and I started a movie club back in the fall. I can’t say the amount of movies that we’ve seen is very long…but the commitment…now that is strong!

Movie club had a meeting this past Sunday that my roommate Ashley wiggled her way in too and I have to say it was a big success! We saw  The Kings Speech, big push to anyone who hasn’t seen it yet…great story!

The main premise from IMBD is this: “The story of King George VI of Britain, his impromptu ascension to the throne and the speech therapist who helped the unsure monarch become worthy of it.” I’m immediately pulled in…bonus the hero of this story is in the allied health department! Not an OT, but speech therapy is pretty close to my field.

“Bertie” is the prince with the speech impediment and we slowly learn how this challenge has caused him trauma throughout his life. The story goes into all the family dynamics and throughout you can see how he is always being reminded of not  measuring up to royal expectations.  Twist; his loving wife. One of my favorite parts in this movie is the way they portray the husband and wives relationship. Clearly her husbands spirit is crushed, but she keeps on fighting for him every way she can. True love.

The main plot of this movie is around the goofy Australian Speech Therapist! The story documents the highs and lows of the prince’s therapy, including the royal drama showing  how what  happens  in your life greatly impacts the therapeutic process. Throughout this, the wife keeps fighting  for her husbands dignity, the therapist keeps trying to earn his patients trust, and the friendship begins between these two men.

There were so many moments in this movie that I loved. All the crazy therapy techniques that I have used before, making a sensory corner for the Prince’s/kings final speech, but, my fav line in this movie was from the ST, “You Must Have Faith in Your Voice”. Such a powerful statement. We need to speak and influence powerfully. Stand behind what we are saying and believe in it. We are all going to have to overcome barriers to find our voice, but we have to have faith in our voice or in our outcome to bust through those walls.

I love it. Have faith in your voice. Go see it.

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Sneak Peak Sundays

Get excited, my plan on Sundays will be to throw a little book sample onto the table. Since were on day two of the blog and since I have a roommate who is forcing me to rush so we aren’t late for church I am going to put the first five pages up. You won’t get quite the full effect because I want each day to be on its own page, but you’ll get the tone I’m trying to set. Welcome to the beginning of ‘You Can Hope’.

Thursday. Phone Call. Screaming. Crying. Running. This can’t be happening. This isn’t real.

Friday. Phone ringing. People everywhere. People crying. People hugging. Scene of the accident. Skid marks. Broken Glass. Pick out a casket. Write an obituary. Find a gravesite. This can’t be real.

Saturday. Xanax.

Sunday. Black Dress. No words. Family. Friends. Students. Coffin.

Monday. Big tree. Hole in the ground. Black Herse. Finally able to say what I’m feeling. I want my dad.

Tuesday. Turn 25. This is the story of my 25th year.

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My First Post!

So, here I am…a blogger! I never thought I would see the day.

The relationships between me and blogs(reading them/stalking my virtual crushes) has been steadily growing through the past year…now with blogs being in my top ten of things I couldn’t live without. And now, with the advice of someone I respect very much I have started a blog!

At first it seemed a bit narcissistic for me to assume that others would be interested in reading what I have to say….so I feel like I should throw a few things on the table of what I can guarantee you will see as you begin to read my blog every Sunday with your morning coffee…

1) I have come to terms with knowing that my life can be compared pretty regularly to a comedic sitcom…with me being the target of the joke. I’m ok with this fact. At times you may say the way I conduct myself or the decisions I make are not exactly ‘typical’ which proves for some pretty funny stories. Case in point, the last 24 hours of my life has held a mechanical bull, a self defense/Judo class where I inappropriately said the word ‘zing’ way too many times, and saying goodbye to a pumpkin of 6 monthes….not exactly what you would call normal.

2) I work with Autistic kids….if you think ‘kids say the darndest things’ is funny, add a neurological deficit. I get through my job by laughing.

3) I’ve recently entered the world of online dating. I now have met; the pooping PT, gold chain, dream Asian, No(Know) Jesus Jon, Cussing Chris, and of course Prince Eric. Even with my husband eyes on I still have yet to find ‘the one’…but the search is on!

4) And lastly…I’m a griever. Lets just get it out there. My name is Michaja, and I’m a griever. My life was broken two years ago when I experienced the sudden loss of my dad, I’ve slowly been putting the pieces back together and I’m attempting to write a grief book. Many of my thoughts that I’m writing will be practice for my book. I’m going to need some critique so ‘we’ can publish this thing! You can hope is the working title…

So, that’s all I’ve got. This is the official invite, so, add this website to your favorites column and let the comments role…

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